Andrew and I are not the type of people that sit back and complain about the Post time and time again without acting on our anger. We like to call and complain and we do it a lot! Well really why wouldn’t we when the postal worker gives us sooooo many things to complain about?

Today I called and made I believe our 5th or 6th official complaint. I can’t be certain of the number for sure because I only started documenting them 4 complaints ago.

You see, our dick of a delivery man doesn’t like to deliver our packages. He likes to put a little blue card in our mail box and simply says we weren’t home. Well we all know that I work from home so this is just not possible. I am ALWAYS home when he puts those cards in the box. Sometimes he claims we must not hear the buzzer. If you’ve been to our place, you know that is impossible. It is LOUD. So this non-delivery problem used to happen ALL the time. Big packages, small… it didn’t matter. The douchebag just never bothered to do his job.

Back in December we had a bit of a breakthrough. We finally thought we complained enough to have some positive turnaround. We spoke to a customer service manager who stated that from now on if the driver attempted a delivery and we weren’t home, the driver was supposed to call this manager and let him know. The manager would then call me to confirm that I was not home. Well after this new protocol was set in place, everything changed. Any time a package came, there was a long and loud BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  BUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ(remember… this guy is a DICK), at our door.

Well last week that all changed when another little blue card magically appeared in the box. We knew this was for three cases of wine and of course the fat slob doesn’t want to deliver 3 cases of wine. That means he’d actually have to carry the weight up two flights of stairs.

So we immediately called the previous customer service manager to report the problem. Unfortunately, his line that is written on the letter we received is no longer in service. So we resorted to the old methods of filing a regular complaint. Well after one week with no word, Andrew called again yesterday. The guy he spoke to assured us the packages would be re-delivered today.

So today there was a BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ at about 9:45 am. It’s the delivery prick asking if I’d be home in an hour for him to deliver my packages. Was he hoping I’d say no? Was he hoping he’d get out of doing his job again? Unfortunately for him I said yes and then he stated, ok make it an hour an a half. Over TWO hours later he finally comes back.

When he huffs and puffs up with all the boxes he says to me “You weren’t home when I tried to deliver before.”

ASDLKJNCWOEIRFNCOAWIERJAWERKNWAEIFJSEFNWIEHJR!!!!!

IS HE KIDDING ME???

Oh I did not handle that comment well. I told him I was home, as I ALWAYS am when he doesn’t deliver our packages. He actually told me that he put a note on our file stating that if I don’t answer the buzzer the first time that he never has to redeliver a package again. I reminded him of the protocol that he was supposed to follow where he needed to call the manager if we weren’t home. He basically denied that was ever the case (even though I SWEAR it worked for awhile) and just kept shaking his head no and saying “nope.”

I “kindly” told him that everyone we know has this problem with them so it’s not just us.

His response? “No, no, it’s just you guys. You weren’t home,  I won’t redeliver again.”

I can’t tell you how fuming I was. I just yelled “whatever” to him as he huffed and puffed down the stairs. I really wanted to kick him in his face. Seriously… WHY couldn’t Andrew have been home when the jerk came? Andrew is a lot meaner than I am… I would have loved to see what he would say to that guy!

So today… the Australian Post received another nice little complaint from me. This time it was against the driver personally. I stated that he was rude and I don’t feel comfortable being alone in the house when he delivers the package because he’s always a jerk. I don’t need a response from them, I just want every little detail documented so that hopefully one day he will lose his job. I simply cannot understand how someone can NOT lose their job after THAT many complaints. I can tell you right now that if I was as lazy as him and if our customers had that many complaints about me- I would not still be employed. How is it possible that he still is entitled to earn an income?

I REALLY want to order another case of wine now so he can refuse to deliver it and I can call and complain again. It’s almost a source of entertainment now.

Imagine navigating the world on your own, facing 12 meter swells and never having a single day off. Imagine spending Christmas and New Year’s all alone. Imagine not standing on solid ground, seeing a single human being or eating fresh food for 7 months. SEVEN months!!

I have to admit, I didn’t follow her journey as she was sailing although now I wish I would have. Knowing what I know now about what she went through makes me realize it would have been awesome to follow her journey and watch her story unfold

Luckily we live in an amazing area so as she came sailing in to Sydney Harbour on Saturday, Andrew, Ben and I decided to walk down to Middle Head where we would have the best possible view to watch her cross the finish line between North and South Head. She was originally supposed to arrive back around11:00am, then it became 11:30 and by the time we arrived at Middle Head we found out it was going to be more like 12:30 due to a torn sail. Well, at nearly 2:00 pm, she FINALLY came sailing in surrounded by masses of other boats. I didn’t really mind that she was that late, I mean I really should give this girl some credit, right? I only wish we would have worn warmer clothes and packed a little picnic to enjoy while we were waiting and enjoying the beautiful view.

The moment we could see her little pink boat and the water canons started going off, a little chill ran down my spine. That’s when it hits you that this YOUNG girl is returning home after being out in that water for more than half the year. After she passed by where we were perched watching with other cheering onlookers we decided to try to walk home quickly to catch a glimpse of her arrival at Circular Quay on the news. Our timing was impeccable and we made it home about 5 minutes before she docked. What an amazing feeling she must have had that day. I can’t even begin to imagine any goal in my life amounting to the last 7 months of her life.

We simply sat there watching the water for hours that day, waiting to catch a glimpse of this little pink boat. Other than the lack of food and sweatshirts… it was a great way to spend the day.

Our day consisted of the typical Australian traditions- a BBQ and lots of drinking. This year we had an added bonus… a swimming pool. I have to say that pools are one of the biggest things I miss from California. It just seems like pools in this country are quite rare and so people typically just go to the beach. While the beach is nice, there’s nothing like lying on a raft in the water for hours on end without having to worry about fish, sharks and seaweed. A big thanks goes out to Alex, Brendan and Kristin for hosting such a fun party!

Australia day was my perfect type of  day. Summer sun, good friends, a refreshing pool, delish food and beverages and of course, Andrew.

Why can’t every day be just like this one?

For more fun in the sun pics- CLICK HERE.

I’ve definitely picked up some Aussie-isms since moving here over 2 years ago. I think them in my head quite often, but I don’t usually speak them out loud. Really I like to think I’m just picking up Andrew-isms but when I was home in June last year my friends quickly pointed out that ‘yeaaauuuhhh’ (probably best if you hear it, not read it) is definitely not just something Andrew says. They all laughed at me and said it was totally Aussie.  But really, that didn’t count as a slip of the Aussie tongue. Honestly, that was just picking up how Andrew talks- it doesn’t necessarily represent all Australians… at least I don’t think it does.

I just don’t think I verbalize many of the Aussie-isms I pick up. I feel that’s because I find it quite annoying when Americans move here and within 2 weeks they’ve acquired an accent, have started spelling differently and start referring to their moms as their mums. I still refuse to write or say “mum” unless I am specifically writing it about an Australian person’s mum. Like today for instance, I was writing an email to Andrew’s brother and I wrote “my mom and your mum blah blah blah…” Yes, I really did spell it differently when I was referring to my mother versus his mother. I clearly filter what I say and write depending on the person I’m talking to. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with picking up the lingo and slang after a few years, but I guess I tried so hard not to be one of those lameos that thinks they have become an Aussie the minute they walk through those airport doors that now it’s actually weird if I say something that sounds Australian.  

So my first official slip of the tongue occurred this week when I was speaking to American clients back home. I said “How are you going?”  No, I didn’t say “how are you doing?”  This was definitely ” how are you going.” I guess it’s good that at least I said how ARE YOU going instead of the traditional “how ya’ goin’?”  I also suppose it’s good that it took me over two years to let that one slip to an American. I was shocked when I said it  and immediately thought “they must be so confused… they won’t know how to respond.” I don’t even remember if they did respond because I was too busy pondering my verbal slip.

But I promise… even though I let that one spill out, I will NOT be saying brekkie, pressies, bikkie, cozzie, dunny or any of those other EEEE words any time soon. Those ones still drive me nuts. Maybe in another two years…

Yes… I live HERE:

This discovery took place on Saturday when Andrew, Mike, Hayley,  Ben and I went on the Bondi to Coogee walk (now I’ve completed 2/5 of#7 from my 101 list). It’s a 12km round trip trek with the most amazing views (clearly). I had heard a lot about the walk in the last 2 years that I’ve lived here but never quite made it past Tamarama.

I always knew Australia had beautiful beaches but come on… these are amazing! Look at that water! Why haven’t you all come to visit me yet? We could actually go to these beaches!

Unfortunately I did not get to go in the water since the purpose of our visit to paradise was to go on this long ass walk. So instead of a bikini, I was wearing tennis shoes and a sports bra. I think this beach is calling me back though… anyone up for a day in the sun in the next few weeks?

Check out a few more pictures if you want to see what else you are missing while you are all sitting in the cold US winter.

 I hope you all had a wonderful New year’s Eve and happy 2010 to you all!!

Our Christmas was spent on two sides of a continent, literally. First we started off with a really nice Christmas Eve at Andrew’s cousin’s house. We had a wonderful BBQ and then enjoyed a fun Secret Santa/Kris Kringle gift exchange. We played the version where you can steal other people’s presents and so it made the game super exciting even though we had a $10 limit (it’s pretty hard to find decent gifts for $10). We headed home that night and Andrew and I had our own little Christmas together. We sat in front of our glittering tree and opened all of our presents for each other and also the ones that my parents gave us. It was a bit sad because it’s the first time in my life that I’ve had to open family presents without my family actually watching.  It’s something I’ll get used to eventually but I’m sure it will take some time.

On Christmas morning we woke up bright and early and headed to Andrew’s dad’s house. Each year everyone gets together for a breakfast BBQ to chow down on bacon and tomato rolls. I’m lucky and I got a very special (and delicious) omelette since I don’t eat bacon. After we all cleaned up we sat down to have our annual Christmas Kris Kringle gift exchange. Veronica was my secret Santa and she got me a set of appetizer plates which I had asked for. Yay, thanks VK! 

After a busy morning, Christmas was still just getting started.  Once Kris Kringle was finished Andrew, his mum and I headed toward the airport and jumped on a flight across the country to Perth. We arrived just in time to enjoy a delicious traditional Christmas dinner at Andrew’s aunt and uncle’s house. Dinner was followed by a family game of trivial pursuit and then we made our way to Andrew’s Nana’s house where we all spent the night. The rest of the quick weekend getaway included Andrew waking up at 4:50am to go for a run (even with the time difference he’s still nuts), lunch in Fremantle, a warm evening BBQ, a morning at the beach and finally a flight back to Sydney. The trip was short but sweet.

Being away from  my family and friends on Christmas is never easy, but having so much to do this year and spending it with ALL of Andrew’s family made it much more special. If you’re interested in seeing photos from this year’s Christmas festivities… click here. I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. Best wishes for a fabulous 2010.

I should be drinking pumpkin spice lattes and egg nog. Instead I’m eating watermelon and drinking iced tea.I should be wearing scarves and hoodies and enjoying the scent of burning fireplaces in the cool, crisp winter air.  Instead, I’m putting on my bathing suit and summer dresses and enjoying the scent of the sea salt on muggy summer afternoons.

The only thing that reminds me that Christmas is next week is the colorful Christmas tree standing in our living room. Even that seems out of place when I’m sweating here on my couch in shorts and a t-shirt. I just don’t know if I’ll ever get used to a summer Christmas. In fact you’ll probably see a blog just like this one next year… and the year after.

Since the days of roast turkey dinners and warm spiced cider are pretty much over for me I’ve decided we’ll just have to start some new festive Christmas traditions of our own. I feel like getting married will be a good starting point for us to begin creating these new traditions. I’ve already decided I want to have a Christmas party every year. My parents always had a party every year as far back as I can remember. It is one of my fondest memories from Christmas as a kid. Many times our parties would fall on Christmas Eve and the adults would let us stay up until midnight to see if we could hear the bells of Santa’s sleigh. I figure we can start of with small get togethers and work our way up to larger, more lavish parties once we actually have a decent house and higher incomes. Maybe we can also create some yummy, summery Christmas recipes to enjoy every year. I don’t know what all we will end up doing, but do I know that I need some ideas to help me adapt to this new version of the holiday season.

Any festive Christmas traditions for soon-to-be newlyweds would be greatly appreciated!

 My hand caught on fire.

Yeah I didn’t spill something on a brand new dress or slip on a puddle causing my shoe to break or anything like that. I literally caught on fire. Note to self: After spilling methylated spirits on your hand while trying to fill a fondue pot burner, make sure to use soap to wash it off. Evidently when you simply wash it with water and then go to re-light the burner, a fireball will erupt burning your hand, the table and anything else surrounding the fondue pot.  Then you will have MORE bad luck and the brie won’t even melt properly and the fondue will be a disaster and look like a disgusting clumpy mess (although it will still taste alright).

Luckily I was able allow my hand to sit under cold running water for about 10 minutes and then I put ice on for another 15. I really think it helped because it’s just red now and I haven’t had any blister pop, unlike the burn on my arm from 2 weeks ago… yes, another burn… which left blisters and a scar.

What is with me and fire and burning body parts lately? 

Even with all the fire drama the night was still really fun! Everyone looked very suave and sexy… see:

There was tons of great finger food and loads of alcohol and fruit so everyone spent the night frequenting the blender to create fancy, tropical concoctions to sip on… or gulp down.

And oh what an awesome view we had:

Such a fun night, even if I did almost burn my hand off! Thanks to Alex, Kristin and Brendan for hosting a great party. And a special thanks to Brendan and whoever else helped put out the fire on the table while I was trying to put out the flames on my hand!

So what better way to celebrate my 2 year anniversary than to partake in a popular Aussie tradition… I headed to the races. I’ve always wanted to go to the races but in 2 years, I still had never been. I must say a BIG BIG THANK YOU to Audra who was fabulous enough to make it possible for me to attend. What girl doesn’t love getting dressed up and spending the day in the sun drinking champagne? Ok, I’m sure plenty of girls don’t- but I do! I even put one of those fancy schmancy fascinators in my hair- although it took me awhile to figure out how I was even supposed to put it on.

Yeah… so anyways… I’ve never gambled on horses. And guess what happend today when I did?

I WON!

AHHHH I WON SO MUCH MONEY!

I bet $3 and won $960!! Yes, that’s nearly A THOUSAND dollars from a $3 buck bet!! WOOHHOO

HAHAHAHAH YAYAYAYAY

Today was the best day EVER! 

Happy 2 year anniversary to me! YAY!

Over an hour later, we settled on buying one of those horse on a stick things. You know, the ones that kids “ride” around on that make the galloping noises? Yeah, one of those. Why? you ask…What happened to your beachy theme gift? you ask…

I’ll tell you what happened… the crappy Australian children’s clothing selection is what happened! And now I will share my experience with you all.

1. First we went to Big W. This is where I had the inspiration for the gift when I found the little bucket and spade. I thought it was a great idea and should be fairly simple! So we headed to the children’s clothing section to look for a suit and after searching for ages we found 1… count that…  ONE bathing suit for a child under 5 years old. ONE! It was hideous.

2. Next we stopped at Pumpkin Patch and found the cutest bathing suite for a 2 year old. SWEET! I thought we had scored in the 2nd shop. This was too easy! But then I had a look at the price tag- nearly $40! No thanks.

3. Next was some other kid store- another CRAP selection of swim suits. We had to hunt and search and finally ask someone where we could find the suits. There were about 2 choices (literally), both heinous! In the U.S. there are whole bathing suit sections in kid stores. OH GOD how I miss Old Navy and U.S. quality Target!

4. Finally we headed to Target – SURELY Target has something right? I thought I had hit the jackpot when I spotted a bathing suit section in the distance. YAY a whole section! This is what I’ve been looking for. I see 3 suits from afar that look decent. I get excited. Oooh a cute little red suit with white polka dots! Woohoo it would even match the red bucket I bought. I grabbed it off the rack with excitement, turned it around and sighed and groaned audibly. Dorthy the freaking dinosaur! WHY oh WHY must people ruin perfectly good children’s clothing by slapping on a big giant ugly cartoon character??? Turns out all the other ones I saw from a distance also were tainted. Dora the Explorer and the Wiggles had to go and ruin them all.

So there we were…Andrew was sick of shopping and I was feeling very homesick… that’s how we ended up buying the horse on a stick (which was the gift idea we had from the beginning anyways)…

When we have kids one day in the far and distant future- please don’t buy anything with Winne the Pooh, The Wiggles, Dora, Elmo, or any of that other crap. I don’t want to have to pretend to like it all and then hide it in the back of the closet only to  pull it out and put it on our child for an hour when you come to visit. Kids have a right to be stylish too!

It takes place on our balcony all day every day and you must be a bird to join. Here are the membership rules and benefits:

1. Fly over whenever you feel like it and enjoy free grapes

2. Sit around squacking and making copious amounts of noise  for hours on end when the club leaders run out of grapes

3. Crap all over the place 

4. Feel free to invite the non-regulars, even though they are a bit retarded and try to fly INTO windows (twice).

Don’t you wish you could join?

No… not you two… I’m talking to the ones upstairs who speak in some language I cannot decipher. I am really getting sick of your late night chats on the balcony. Seriously, I don’t hear you at all during the day or evening but for some reason you must go on to your balcony EVERY single night after 11:00 pm to have your daily 15 minute foreign chat. Oh and I REALLY don’t appreciate the random 1:00 am sessions. Those seriously suck.

It frustrates me that I can’t even eavesdrop and be nosey since I can’t understand you. Where the hell are you from anyways?? It frustrates me even MORE that you keep me awake at night. Don’t you need to sleep too?

Andrew was going to write you a letter once. Even though he USUALLY falls asleep before you start yacking, he really felt bad for me being kept up every night. But I stopped him from putting the note under your door one night at 3am because I didn’t think it was very nice. Here’s what it said in big black sharpie marker:

“SHUT THE F*%K UP”

I thought there must be a nicer way to go about asking you to be quiet, but considering I’ve lived here for over a year and a half and I still don’t think I’ve ever really seen your face, I  don’t exactly feel comfortable approaching you. So instead I just lie there each night waiting patiently for your 15 minutes of annoying chatter to end.

SO since I am afraid of confrontation, I’m REALLY happy that I now get to write this second letter to our OTHER neighbors. I thought I’d run it by you first. Let me know what you think…

-E

*********

Dear Other Mystery Neighbor,

You are wonderful.

When my boyfriend wanted to write a mean note to the yackies upstairs, I stopped him because I didn’t think it was very nice to use the F word. Well, clearly, that’s just something Australians do- or maybe just people in this apartment block. I remember on Halloween one guy in the block yelled “Oi F*%K off kids!!”  to some little teenage punks. That was pretty funny. Maybe that was your husband.

I just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate what you did for all of us last night. I could hear you yelling “shut up!” numerous times. I just laid there smiling, comforted knowing that someone else had been feeling my pain all these nights. I always thought I may be the only one who was going crazy from their conversations. But the gabbers upstairs just didn’t hear you. I don’t know why because I certainly heard you, even with my window closed. So I found it thoroughly amusing when you finally screamed in your shrill, angry voice:

“SHUUUUUUUUUT UUUUUUUPPPPP. You F*%King talk out there EVERY NIGHT!”

Well, I think they finally got the hint because they did shut up and they went inside.

I truly think your message got through to them. Maybe using the F word really is the only way to get things done around these parts! Hopefully tonight we will all sleep a little easier!

Thanks again for taking care of the situation (and thanks to my BF who attempted to take care of the situation 2 weeks ago even though I intercepted his note and threw it in the trash bin).

-E

I only started reading Lindsay’s blog recently, so I’m not totally up to date on her life, but is it weird that as we walked around the Botanical gardens, I had conversations with Daisy about the guys she’s dated and her uni program? Is it weird that I knew all about the horrible blister on her foot? Is it weird that she was talking to me about the birds that visit my apartment everyday?

Is it weird that a foreign guy stopped us and asked us if  we would mind standing on his back as he laid on the grass while someone else took a picture?

Huh?

Yes, that actually happened. Here was how the conversation went:

Weird guy: Excuse me, are you all travelers? (detected our accents I suppose)

Us: ummmmm uuhhh yeah (hard to answer that one because yes, we are foreign but no, we’re not really “travelers”).

*** we suspect he is about to ask us for directions or something normal, but no… no such luck.***

Weird guy: I’m wondering if you might be able to help me. I’m trying to get a photo (pulling out fancy camera) but it’s kind of hard to get.  I basically want the photo of me lying on the grass with 2 people standing on my back.

Us:    …

Weird guy: You know, like I’m “down under”

Us:    …

Weird guy: I’ll give you $20 between the  four of you.

All of us: Uhhh ummm… ok???

Elsja and Daisy: Oh they can do it (pointing to Lindsay and Emily), they are the smallest!!

Weird guy: Oh how about one of you  (Lindsay/Emily) and one of you (Elsja/Daisy)

Daisy: She’ll do it (pointing to me), she’s shorter! (thanks by the way)

So, we decided to help the guy out. Either he was a really artsy person who genuinely wanted to get a shot to send back home of him “down under” OR he was a complete freak who gets turned on by REALLY weird things. Either way, it wasn’t going to hurt us to help him out. At least we have a funny story to tell now. Oh… and all of us were quite curious- why did he ask us if we were travelers? Wouldn’t local Aussies be better candidates if he wanted to be “down under”? Maybe he’s been told off by too many of them already. Seriously, have any of you out there ever had a weirder request from a stranger? If so, I’d love to hear it!

Lastly, while I’m on the topic of all things weird, I’d like to comment on this tree.  Amanda and Stephen took these photos last week and I didn’t think much of them until I actually went and saw the tree today.

First of all, this tree really DOES mysteriously drop random branches, I saw it happen with my own two eyes. Weird. But what’s even weirder is the sign. I hadn’t really thought about this until some guy pointed it out today. “This tree may drop branches without warning.”

Without warning?

Really? 

Is there any OTHER way this may occur? Like would the tree have some branch dropping alarm to notify you of falling branches? Would some guy sit in the tree all day to yell at people when one was about to fall?

Wouldn’t “This tree may drop branches” suffice?

Now I’m back to my normal apartment where I am doing normal work and am about to eat a normal dinner. Maybe later one of my neighbors will come ask me if I would mind putting on some rollerskates and helping them paint their living room. That wouldn’t be weird at all.

So now for the list…

We ate dinner at Thai Intra (of course)

We had breakfast at Balmoral and walked around the beach.

We took the ferry to Circular Quay, had lunch at a little cafe in the Rocks and walked around Darling Harbour.

We had 2 fun dinners at home. I made my Mexican tortilla soup stuff and Amanda made her zucchini casserole. Casserole night also consisted of Paul coming for dinner and we all had some wine and played some board games and Wii… it was a fun night.

We went to Centrepoint tower for some ridiculously expensive drinks. Although I must say, Amanda’s lychee martini with”violet ravioli” was quite interesting and worth the $20 she paid for it. It came with this spoon full of little red jello type balls (violet ravioli) that burst open withliquid when you sucked on them. So you put one in your mouth, took a sip of the martini and squeezed the jello thingy and there was a flavor explosion in your mouth. VERY interesting and actually quite good.

We went to Wagamama for dinner, then headed to James Squire to watch some footy and then we headed off to Cargo for some drinks and tunes.

We had lunch in Bondi and walked around the cliffs a bit to check out the views

We went to Kris’ 30th birthday at Corner Bar in North Sydney.  We all proceeded to get quite drunk and I woke up so hungover that it was hard for me to say goodbye to my friends as they left for the airport. I do believe this was a good thing though. If I was in a normal mental state (ie. not overcome by the headache from hell and the need to puke) I probably would have been crying and depressed.

Additionally Amanda and Stephen went off on their own and did the following while I was working:

• Harbour Bridge climb
• Took the Hop on/Hop off bus
• Ate pies at Harry’s Cafe de Wheels
• Walked around the botanical Gardens/Opera house and saw all the bats
• Went to Wildlife world
• Had dinner in Kirribilli- attempted to go to Luna Park but it was closed
• Went to Manly Beach

I think that’s it… I’m sure I probably missed something but I’m sure Amanda can remind me if I did. I think we all had a great week. We packed a lot in to the 7  1/2 short days they were here and I was definitely tired Sunday afternoon… but it was all well worth it!!